Who doesn’t want to be more charming? Well, you should want this. With more charm, you will add more to the lives of others than trying to beat them into submission. You get my point, right? Charm is rarely thought about in the busy lives of us leaders. Today we explore deep into a charm with Jordan Harbinger, from “The Art of Charm”. We talk about increasing social influence and building trust. Get all the charm you can handle with this episode and add some to your life/business too.
Jordan’s Target Audience: Includes Men and Women that want to level up in their relationship development skills (dating or business). Most people want both. But there’s more demand for business these days. Jordan encounters all types of entrepreneurs, to high-end sales guys to intelligence and military force representatives. His Art of Charm podcast listeners is rather broad and hard to categorize. Jordan’s podcast gets over 1 million downloads per month.
runs the art of charm podcast
So what is the real definition of social influence? It is the amount of people who trust who you are and what you have. Do they trust you to recommend things, entertain, etc? It all comes down to TRUST!
Relationships are a big part of success and happiness. Jordan arrived at this big revelation when he learned this from a lawyer (a colleague) while he was working on Wall Street. This lawyer never spent any time in the office. He was constantly out building relationships and bringing in the business. This motivated Jordan to start delving into the study of the psychology of influence and persuasion that transformed into the “Art of Charm.” Essentially the mission behind Art of Charm is about teaching people how to become Friends before business. People who are your friends like and trust you. There is a sense of warmth that people gravitate to that isn’t achieved with other methods.
This is the highest leverage scale set you can have. Because people want to do business with people they like and trust, there’s an advantage to having a network like that. There’s a clear advantage when you have a huge network of people who can recommend you. People in other countries base who they do business with on familial connections. Jordan says that in the west we sort of lie to ourselves and say we will be “fair” about who we choose and choose our friend anyway. This is so true!
What are mistakes people make when they are trying to make this change?
Jordan says they’re fake and inauthentic. People don’t think through how to connect with people. When people say things like, “hey, I want to pick your brain” – there is no value for that person on the receiving end of that message and that is why it doesn’t work. Or sending invaluable or irrelevant information (which was not well thought out) also doesn’t work.
Be aware of your EGO. When you feel someone’s bigger than you and feel resentful about it, it is bad news from the start. But people sometimes go ahead and build a relationship with them because they need something from that person. This foundation is weak because it becomes about using people, which is NOT what building relationships are about.
If you need something from someone but you are not thinking about how you can HELP them- it’s problematic. It’s easier to just be kind and helpful to others all the time because it ends up working for you. You even end up connecting with people degrees away from the primary person. Be sure you are giving value always!
In this episode we’ll cover:
- How to become friends before business
- The real definition of Social Influence
- How to build your Know Like and Trust factor
- The enemies of building relationships
- Why you should just be kind all the time
- Why you should give VALUE all the time
Practical and Actionable
Create a double intro optin. Make a list of 5 introductions you can make and do it. The worst case scenario you may experience is that they say no or don’t respond. These don’t have to be business intros! It’s being helpful not to expect something in return. It’s about being personal.
Resources and Links
- Contact Jordan: firstname.lastname@example.org
- The Art Of Charm Website
- Check out the Art of Charm podcast
- Jordan on Twitter
- Reach out to Gene for your biz concerns
- Join Momentum Mondays
- Join Mastery
- Ready to take the STAGE? Get more info here!
- Leave a review on itunes
- Share the LOVE and TWEET about this episode.
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